Nice but dim

Weekly Review

It was a solid week for Pie-backers with three wins out of four, but I appreciate that the high concentration of heavily odds-on bets may have failed to capture the imagination of some. I promise bigger prices next week.

Bayern Munich 2-0 Marseille (Tip: HT/FT: Bayern/Bayern +7.27)

Ivica Olic opened the scoring after 13 minutes and doubled his tally eight minutes before half time. This bet never looked in doubt.

The goals were the Croatian’s first in the Champions League since he struck a second-leg hat-trick in the 2010 semi-final with Lyon.

Barcelona 3-1 AC Milan (Tip: Barca to win +14.29)

Although Barcelona showed their brilliance in flashes, they were aided by some clumsy and naive defending.

Luca Antonini played the role of clumsy, awkwardly chopping down Lionel Messi for the penalty which put the Catalan side back ahead after Zlatan Ibrahimovic had levelled Andres Iniesta’s opener.

Then, experienced World Cup winner Alessandro Nesta was downright stupid, as he tugged down Sergio Busquets in an off-the-ball incident to give away the second spot kick of the night.

Messi converted both and, in the process, broke his own previous record for the highest number of goals scored in a single Champions League campaign (14).

Sunderland 0-0 Tottenham Hotspur (Tip: Cattermole to receive the first booking -£5)

God loves a trier. And Lee Cattermole tried his hardest to win this bet for me, but referee Chris Foy had other ideas. The tough-tackling midfielder looked certain to win the quick-caution prize when he crunched into Sandro midway through the first half. However, Foy decided a waggle of the head and a shake of the finger was punishment enough. The Brazilian eventually retaliated and took the honours.

Arsenal 1-0 Manchester City (Tip: Arsenal to beat Man City [draw-no-bet] +7.78)

Despite not claiming the winning goal until three minutes before the end, Arsenal thoroughly deserved their victory. City failed to muster a single shot on target and Mario Balotelli’s fourth red card in two seasons added insult to injury in stoppage time. Game set and match Manchester United, surely.

Beware of the Catt

Longshot – £5 on 7/1 at Blue Square

Sunderland V Tottenham Hotspur (Saturday 12.45) – Lee Cattermole to receive the first booking.

This has all the attributes of a cracking anorak’s bet, but with the price of a meaty longshot. Heavenly!

Spurs are squeaky clean in terms of their discipline. Only Swansea City (35) have received fewer yellow cards than Harry Redknapp’s team (37) in this season’s Premier League. Therefore, the likelihood is that it will be a Sunderland (50) player that referee Chris Foy cautions first.

Sunderland captain Cattermole has been shown six yellow cards in his last eight appearances and is odds-on to be booked at some point.

The 24-year-old beacon of aggression will be extra grouchy and likely to show frustration early on, because he is set to play through the pain-barrier with a knee ligament strain.

Furthermore, the visitors’ quick passing and slick movement will tick the Stockton-born midfielder right off and he may well decide to make his presence felt in the opening exchanges.

Respect…

Them’s the rules

Weekend Review

Courtesy of a little ‘Brucie bonus’ in the form William Hill’s first goalscorer policy, what I perceived to be a minuscule loss this weekend was, in fact, a tidy win.

Liverpool 1-2 Arsenal (Tip: Robin van Persie to score first +£25)

The bookmaker’s goalscorer market rules state: “Own goals do not count in pre-match first goalscorer betting. In the event of an own goal first goalscorer bets are not void but carry forward to the next goal.”

Therefore, despite Laurent Koscielny opening the scoring at Anfield on Saturday afternoon by slicing the ball past his own keeper, the second goal of the game, scored by Robin van Persie, was recognised by William Hill as the first. Winner.

Tottenham Hotspur 1-3 Manchester United (Tip: Both teams to score +£6.15)

As a Spurs fan, I was disappointed by the result, but goals goals goals were promised and delivered. Ronseal.

Newcastle United 1-1 Sunderland (Tip: Newcastle to win -£10)

I predicted a home win and it could have been so but for an inspired display from Simon Mignolet, including superb use of gamesmanship in the build up to Demba Ba’s failed penalty kick. My side-note prediction of a Sunderland red card was proved correct though, as the Tyneside cauldron got the better of Stephane Sessegnon and then the ever-reliable Lee Cattermole.

Manchester City 2-0 Bolton Wanderers (Tip: Manchester City to win [banker] +£8.33)

A genuine cruise for Roberto Mancini’s team, who are now just a win against Chelsea away from breaking the Premier League record for most consecutive home wins (currently 19 [joint with Manchester United]).

Good games

After the rollercoaster of the past fortnight, the Pie will be reducing its weekly output by 50%. A £50 banker, £10 Anorak’s bet, £10 bet on the Big Game and a £5 Longshot will still be featured. However, these tips will be delivered in two instalments throughout the week.

Toon to tourment

Big Game – £10 on 6/5 at William Hill

Newcastle United V Sunderland (Sunday 12.00) – Newcastle to win

Sunderland have not won at St James’ Park since November 2000. Since then, they have lost four and drawn two at the home of their bitter North-East rivals.

After losing this fixture 5-1 last season and crashing to a 4-0 defeat at West Brom last week, Martin O’Neill will be demanding a big response from his players. Extra pressure is the last thing the visitors need though, as 49,000 Geordies will abuse and provoke their players. Considering the Black Cats have received a red and 15 yellow cards during their last three visits to Tyneside, don’t be surprised if they finish the game shy of 11 players, especially considering Lee Cattermole is back in the side.

Newcastle have won seven out of 13 at home this season, while Sunderland have lost seven out of 13 on the road.

During his young career, 23-year-old Cattermole has 64 yellow and 5 red cards to his name.

No likey, no lighty

Weekend Review

On Saturday evening, I laughed as I watched White, a Brighton-based goth, receive a swift and ruthless blackout on Take me out.

By 4pm on Sunday, I felt distinctly empathetic towards him, as all four of my weekend bets turned red for rejection.

Later in the same show, Gracie, the biggest drain on the show’s electric bill with her rarely-turned-off light, said ‘trust’ was the most important thing she looked for in a man.

Now, I am pleading will all readers of the Pie at half time to hang around and trust me, as things are sure to get better very soon.

White failing

Arsenal 5-2 Tottenham Hotspur (Tip: Spurs to win [draw-no-bet] -£10)

Spurs had an off day. It is as simple as that. After taking an early two-goal lead, Harry Redknapp’s team played like a team of young virgins who had just talked elder stunners into bed – they were shocked by their success and frightened by the pressure of finishing the job.

Wigan Athletic 0-0 Aston Villa, West Brom 4-0 Sunderland (Tip: two away wins -£5)

Despite being booed-off by their own support, Villa came very close to winning this one and I stand by selecting them. Sunderland, on the other hand, were awful. Also, I underestimated just how much of a positive impact the Baggies’ Black Country Derby victory over Wolves would have on their immediate form.

Birmingham City 1-2 Nottingham Forest (Tip: Birmingham to win [banker] -£50)

Birmingham boss Chris Hughton said that he was “disappointed” with his side’s showing after Nottingham Forest caused one of the shocks of the season at St Andrews. Believe me Chris, so was I.

I don’t really know how to analyse this anomalous result without delving into the old book of football cliches. Therefore, I won’t bother.

Arsenal 5-2 Tottenham Hotspur (Tip: Arsenal to receive more bookings -£10)

I still believe that this was a very shrewd bet.  I feel that Spurs’ unexpected poor showing and obscene capitulation caused their players to lose their tempers which, consequently, led to silly bookings.

Gracie: keep believing